Part 3

If you haven’t already, you can start by reading Part 1 and Part 2 of Stephanie Overanalyzes Toy Story. Yes, I have a lot to say about Toy Story.

Slinky Dog

The idea that Slinky Dog would be anything other than a useless ball of mangled coils dumped in a heap at the bottom of Andy’s toy bin by the time Toy Story 3 rolls around is just complete horse malarkey. NO WAY IN HELL has a slinky toy survived 18 years without ONE twisted spring. Especially with the life that Slink has led. There’s a scene in Toy Story 2 where he stretches from the 2nd floor window all the way to the ground. Repeatedly. I am not a physicist, but I feel confident saying Slinky Dog doesn’t contain enough coils for that to be physically attainable. He’s a nice guy and all, but Slinky Dog is an impossibility of nature.

This Is Really All Potato Head’s Fault

I’d like to posit that Toy Story wouldn’t have taken such an ugly turn in the rivalry between Woody and Buzz if Mr. Potato Head hadn’t been such a dick. From the moment Buzz Lightyear shows up in Andy’s room, Potato Head takes every opportunity to rile Woody up with his perceived shortcomings. Oh Buzz has a laser! “How come YOU don’t have a laser, Woody??” It doesn’t take a degree in psychology to see that Potato Head is working out his own years-long feelings of resentment toward Woody being Andy’s favorite toy. The more I watch Toy Story, the more I think that without Potato Head’s constant jackassery, it’s possible Woody’s kind, reasonable side may have won out long before he pushed Buzz out a window. Woody should’ve tossed Potato Head’s mouth out the window instead; maybe everyone would’ve ended up happier! Let this be a lesson, kids… If your “friends” are constantly comparing you to other people, pointing out your flaws, & making you feel less than, they’re not really your friends.

“We Don’t Know Who Turned On That TV.”

Uh, yes we do, Stinky Pete. Because I, Jessie, and my good pal Bullseye were standing here in transparent glass cases in full view of the whole room, so there would be NO POSSIBLE WAY we didn’t see you get out of your box, turn the TV on, and place the remote control DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF MY CASE. You’re clearly working against us here. Quick, let’s tape him in his box and get out of here before we have to make an unbelievably dramatic escape from, like, a moving airplane or something crazy.

What Is Woody Suppressing?

Herein lies my biggest question about the Toy Story universe: What is Woody’s history, and why doesn’t it seem to inform his present in any way?

Woody is as old as the Prospector, Bullseye, and Jessie. We can all agree on this, yes? And yet while Toy Story 2 deals very explicitly with Stinky Pete’s seething anger and Jessie’s trauma over the past few decades, there is no hint or mention at what Woody’s past holds. HE HAS BEEN AROUND AS LONG AS THEY HAVE! Why doesn’t Woody have a tragic story of loss & heartbreak from his past? Why does it always seem like Andy is the first kid who’s ever owned him? Woody could not have been a “new” toy when Andy received him. He either had a previous owner(s), or he was a second-hand toy at flea market or thrift store. So even IF Andy is Woody’s first real owner, then Woody would at least have some resentful memories of spending decades on “a dime-store shelf watching every other toy be sold” like the Prospector, right? Right?!!

Guys. I’m so confused by this! Woody has 30ish years of his life that are completely unacknowledged. I need to know what Woody’s life was like before Andy and why he seems to be suppressing it in the present. I understand that many of Andy’s other toys could also have history beyond Andy. The reason I’m fixated on Woody’s past is because Toy Story 2 goes to great lengths detailing Woody’s incredible history. So why doesn’t Woody already know who he is?! Really think about this. Woody must have been created and sold during the era when Woody’s Roundup was popular, presumably alongside other Sheriff Woody dolls. How could he not know he’s a popular TV character, just as Jessie & Stinky Pete know? Why doesn’t he have memories of being played with as Sheriff Woody in the 1960’s? YOU GUYS, WHAT HAPPENED TO WOODY?!

Ok, I need to take a breath. The Woody thing always gets me riled up. Seriously, I edited about 3 paragraphs of ranting out of this section. This one really gets me.

So Long, Partner

After years of overanalyzing and nitpicking, you might think Toy Story has fallen in my esteem. Sure, there are facets of the story that don’t hold up to even the faintest scrutiny. However, in the end, none of that really seems to matter.

In writing this, I looked up the final scene of Toy Story 3 on YouTube to make sure I had a certain detail correct. And instead of cataloging the dialogue like I meant to, I found myself wrapped up in the scene once again –  watching a teenage boy and his beloved toys have one final playtime together and then say one of the most fulfilling & heartbreaking goodbyes in cinematic history. I teared up all over again. Some of the logical details may falter, but the heart of Toy Story stays strong with every single viewing… even when you’re purposefully trying to overanalyze it. That’s the enduring legacy of Toy Story.